Where do they find these travel writers??
He whines:
Penniless in 'the sleaziest place on earth' ....from the moment I step on to the town's main strip, I know this place isn't for me. My heart sinks further when I go to my hotel.
Although it's a neat little number just off the main strip, when it comes to paying for my room I discover that my Visa card is missing.
Initially I feel I was probably pick-pocketed on the bus. Then it dawns on me that I must have left it in an ATM in Bangkok.
So he is a stupid tourist and a bit of a pussy
Having just $10 to my name, I start to panic. So I ring my mum. She promises to sort something out for me, somehow.
Like Mummy should even be an option in Patty!
To take my mind off things, I go for a walk but within five minutes it's clear that I'm stuck in possibly the sleaziest place on earth.
Neon lights advertising girls, sex and more girls flash incessantly.
Petite girls in mock school uniforms are holding up boards promoting "two for one cocktails" and "free sex shows". A few hours later, I'm awoken by a bleeping text message.
I remember a bar that gave me one free beer AND a cocktail for every beer I bought... insane. And no nudity around me either...
It's from my saviour. "I've wired some cash out to you – be good," Mum says.
Wishful thinking Mum...your "son" is a pussy!
At dawn, I head to the exchange office, show my passport and almost bite the poor woman's hand off as she gives me the notes.
I hail a taxi to the bus stop and ride back to Bangkok, breathing a monumental sigh of relief.
Good god, there is a reason why Pattaya is well known for parties as well as pretty good tourist activities. It looks like lame boy booked from an el-cheapo establishment and was dropped off right in the middle of Walking Street. Pattaya also has good diving, excellent nightlife AWAY from the go go's and hotels/shopping that are far removed from upsetting this little delicate reviewers sensibility.
In fact the entire article may as well have not been written. I'm surprised he even got through Bangkok although we have yet to see poor Steves experiences from that big bad town.
I hope he wasn't paid on completion of these travels and I hope his mother charged interest on that loan... I hate tourists like this. Judgemental and utterly pathetically lame. Article here.




